Kevin Neece got hit with some dialogue inspiration for one of the later films in Death Note War Games while he was at the theater watching Nightmare Before Christmas and Scream 2. In order to extend the run time of the Climactic film at Barton Creek Mall, my idea is, what if Kevin Neece and Sepheranz the Spider Queen got side tracked on their way to the Mall, and it resulted in them being arrested and taken in by a Traffic Cop who didn't have any way to identify them and was unaware of who he was arresting.
From that point on, for the entire first hour of the film, the movie becomes a showcase for what Broken Lizard's Super Troopers might have looked like when the Police Officers were re-imagined in the context of an Alfred Hitchcock Suspense Thriller that was entirely dialogue driven. And while these dialogue interactions are happening at the Police Station, everyone is locked in because of a terrible Lightning and Rain Storm, and find themselves engaging with each other through the night until Kevin Neece and Sepheranz find a way to escape the next morning before the Barton Creek Mall opens setting the stage for the Final Confrontation in the Third Act of the Movie.
AH MY GODDESS:
THE SHOWDOWN AT BARTON CREEK MALL
And
SUPER TROOPERS CAT AND MOUSE
Written by KEVIN NEECE and
HEKATE GODDESS OF THE CROSSROADS
48 Pages Rough Draft
FADE IN:
EXT STARBUCKS SOUTH AUSTIN
CUT TO:
INT STARBUCKS SOUTH AUSTIN LOBBY
SEPHERANZ THE SPIDER QUEEN:
Is something wrong? The Internet Stopped working and we can't get a signal.
RYUK THE SHINIGAMI:
It doesn't take a genius to figure out that the Austin Police Department shut us down again after we sent out too many Free Starbucks emails from the Holy Grail that is Anthony Weiner's Laptop.
KEVIN NEECE:
Maybe the Austin Police Department were Cowboy Bebop fans, and it pissed them off when we Death Noted Spike Spiegel and the other Bounty Hunters from Team Bebop, and then General Ryuk engaged in a Stand off with Historical Jesus Christ and the MI5.
RYUK THE SHINIGAMI:
Kevin... it was not my fault that Historical Jesus Christ was traveling around with the Marller Gang when Team Bebop finally caught up with them. I can kill a lot of people, but Historical Jesus Christ is not one of them. He became immune to the effects of the Death Note Spells when he was resurrected from the Dead, just like Leonardo Dicaprio and Ellen Degeneres were in Salem Massachusetts.
SEPHERANZ THE SPIDER QUEEN:
Well what do you want to do about this Kevin. Is it time for you to pack it in and head to the next wifi hot spot. How many more members of the Illuminati Families and Criminal Organizations do we need to hunt down before this is all over.
KEVIN NEECE:
I don't know. The Illuminati are like Hydra. The more Illuminati Scumbags that we kill from the Cult of Baal, the more that come out of the wood works to take their place. This may be a futile losing battle, but if we have any self respect left for our jobs, we'll make a run for the Free Wifi at the Barton Creek Mall Food Court. And we'll finish the job together before the Austin Police Department takes us out. After all, they can only kill me once.
CUT TO:
EXT. CAPITAL OF TEXAS HIGHWAY
Cue the Driving Montage set to The Eurythmics The Last Time.
THE EURYTHMICS:
Well the First Time, that I saw you, you were standing, in the rain. You were waiting, at the station, for the last, connecting train. Who do you go to, when there's no one, left to blame. And I say, who do you go to, when your best friends, turn away, hey hey. Last time you're gonna let me down, last time you're gonna fool around with me. It's the last time. Last time you're gonna let me down. Last time you're gonna fool around with me. It's the last time baby. There's a garden, full of roses, there's a necklace, full of pearls, you have come, to take the roses, to give to other girls, well, I'm just a pretty thing, you wanted, for a day, there is nothing, left between us, there is nothing, left to say, hey hey. Last time you're gonna let me down, last time you're gonna fool around with me, it's the last time. Last time you're gonna let me down, last time you're gonna fool around with me. It's the last time baby.
CUT TO:
Kevin Neece is pulled over by a Police Cruiser. The APD Traffic Cop that approaches his driver's side window is Actor Jay Chandrasekhar reprising Captain Thorny from the Broken Lizard film Super Troopers.
CUT TO:
INT KEVIN NEECE'S CAR
CAPTAIN THORNY:
License and Registration Please.
KEVIN NEECE:
I sincerely apologize Officer Sir. Was I speeding again? I'm not mad at you for doing your job.
CAPTAIN THORNY:
License... and Registration Please.
KEVIN NEECE:
My License is in my wallet in my pocket. Permission to reach for my wallet sir.
CAPTAIN THORNY:
Just keep your hands where I can see them.
Kevin Neece intentionally drops his wallet under the seat.
KEVIN NEECE:
Officer sir... I appear to have been mistaken. My wallet isn't in my pocket. I must have left it at home.
CAPTAIN THORNY:
Do you have your Driver's Insurance or Registration?
SEPHERANZ THE SPIDER QUEEN:
No Officer Sir, they appear to have gone missing from the Glove Compartment.
CAPTAIN THORNY:
Is this your girlfriend?
KEVIN NEECE:
Yes and No. This is my newlywed wife Barbara. We recently eloped and drove in to Austin Texas from Los Angeles California.
CAPTAIN THORNY:
Do you have a name?
KEVIN NEECE:
Victor. My name is Victor Morozoff.
CAPTAIN THORNY:
Do you know how fast you were going Victor Morozoff?
KEVIN NEECE:
No Officer Sir. How fast was I going?
CAPTAIN THORNY:
Fast enough for me to pull you over.
KEVIN NEECE:
Isn't the Speed Limit 70 on Capital of Texas Highway Officer Sir?
CAPTAIN THORNY:
The Speed Limit is indeed 70 on Capital of Texas Highway.
KEVIN NEECE:
Then how much faster could I have possibly been going?
CAPTAIN THORNY:
Fast enough for me to pull you over.
KEVIN NEECE:
I'm pretty sure there were other people going faster that I was.
CAPTAIN THORNY:
Yes, but I wasn't fast enough to catch them. I was fast enough to catch you. I would never dream of letting you go Victor Morozoff. You are the center of my attention. You are the light of my life. You are my entire state of being, and you exist at the very center of my universe. You complete me Victor Morozoff. Now it's my turn to complete the both of you. You can scream all you want in the local cemeteries, because we're still coming to get you Barbara.
(beat)
SEPHERANZ THE SPIDER QUEEN:
Victor Darling... stop patronizing the poor officer... we'll happily take the ticket and pay it later.
CAPTAIN THORNY:
I'm afraid I can't do that. One of your tail lights is out. And your brake lights aren't working either. When was the last time your car passed inspection?
KEVIN NEECE:
I wouldn't remember. Isn't that why they give us the stickers on the windshield?
CAPTAIN THORNY:
Your Sticker is Expired.
SEPHERANZ THE SPIDER QUEEN:
Officer Sir... are we under arrest?
CAPTAIN THORNY:
Well you don't have your License or Registration. You don't have Proof of Insurance. Your Tail Lights and your Brake Lights are out. And your Sticker is Expired. Do you even know your own Driver's License Number?
KEVIN NEECE:
That's why I have a Driver's License. So I don't have to remember it.
CAPTAIN THORNY:
But you don't have your Driver's License on you now. How convenient that you magically and mysteriously no longer have your driver's license. So tell me, what's your driver's license number Victor Morozoff?
KEVIN NEECE:
It's deeply personal.
CAPTAIN THORNY:
Don't lie to me Victor. Because my Bullshit-o-meter is operating at over 101 percent today. And today my aim is right on target.
SEPHERANZ THE SPIDER QUEEN:
Bullshit Artist. Your bullshit-o-meter is no match for my...
CAPTAIN THORNY:
Just a moment. Stay right where you are. Do not attempt to drive off. If you run... you're looking at Twenty Years in Prison for Evading Arrest.
SEPHERANZ THE SPIDER QUEEN:
I can think of a lot worse things to get arrested for.
CUT TO:
EXT POLICE CRUISER
OFFICER RABBIT:
We can't run the plates Thorny. Our Mobile Data Terminal isn't working.
CAPTAIN THORNY:
Are you able to call it in over the Radio?
OFFICER RABBIT:
The Radio is down too.
CAPTAIN THORNY:
So you can't run their plates? And you can't Radio in for backup or verification? What about your iphone? Can't you just call the station?
OFFICER RABBIT:
My iphone doesn't appear to have a signal, for the moment.
CAPTAIN THORNY:
Mine doesn't appear to be working either, for the moment.
OFFICER RABBIT:
So what do you think we should do?
CAPTAIN THORNY:
I think we should take them in to the station and let God sort them out.
CUT TO:
INT KEVIN NEECE'S CAR
KEVIN NEECE:
Officer Sir, are you going to have our car towed?
CAPTAIN THORNY:
All in Good Time Victor. All in Good Time. I'm going to have to ask you both to step out of the vehicle.
SEPHERANZ THE SPIDER QUEEN:
You're not going to perform a Cavity Search on me are you Officer Sir?
CAPTAIN THORNY:
Why would we perform a Cavity Search on you? Are you hiding something in your Asshole or Vagina?
SEPHERANZ THE SPIDER QUEEN:
Yes Officer Sir. It's your mother. She tripped and fell right in face first after a night of sleep walking.
(beat)
CAPTAIN THORNY:
Please Step out of the Vehicle Barbara. Don't make me ask you twice.
SEPHERANZ THE SPIDER QUEEN:
You can search my Vagina all you want, but you're never going to find her. You have a much higher chance of scoring cocaine from the Studio Executives at Disney.
CAPTAIN THORNY:
Barbara. Victor. Step out of the Vehicle Please. You both have the right to remain silent. Anything you say or do can be held against you in a court of law. You both look like you already know the rest.
CUT TO:
EXT AUSTIN POLICE DEPARTMENT HEADQUARTERS
CUT TO:
INT APD CHIEF LISA DAVIS OFFICE
APD CHRISTIAN FRITZ:
Chief, we've got a problem... one of our officers was called in to report an abandoned car somewhere along the Capital of Texas Highway. The car belonged to Kevin Neece, but he was nowhere to be found. We know this because he left his wallet under the seat with his driver's license.
APD CHIEF LISA DAVIS:
Why would Kevin Neece and Sepheranz the Spider Queen abandon their car along the side of the road to Barton Creek Mall and just disappear out of thin air? If they were making a run for the Free Wifi at the Barton Creek Mall Food Court, then shouldn't their car have been parked in the parking lot somewhere around the AMC Barton Creek Square Theater Entrance?
APD CHRISTIAN FRITZ:
They're not at the Barton Creek Mall Food Court. We searched the entire premises and checked the security cameras around the entrances. They're both gone. We think one of our Traffic Cops may have pulled them over and tried to take them both in, and the reason why they haven't been reported is because he ditched his identification and his wallet to prevent them from identifying them. They might not be aware that they have the Death Note Killer in their custody because they couldn't identify them. Sepheranz The Spider Queen doesn't have a Social Security Number or Driver's License because she came here from the Spirit Underworld.
APD CHIEF LISA DAVIS:
Why didn't they just run his Plates after they pulled him over?
APD CHRISTIAN FRITZ:
They didn't run his plates. If they had, it would have been entered into our Systems. It's possible that the reason why they didn't run his plates is because their Mobile Data Terminals were down. Kevin Neece is haunted by the System Force remember. The Goddess Hotline Office used the System Force to dismantle all of the weapons and firearms in the United States for Death Note War Games, what makes you think they couldn't sabotage our Mobile Data Terminals to prevent them from being identified by the Traffic Cops?
APD CHIEF LISA DAVIS:
If one of your Traffic Cops took Kevin Neece and Sepheranz the Spider Queen into custody, and they wound up placing them in the wrong interrogation room at the hands of an Abusive Police Officer, and they back them into a corner, there is virtually nothing that would prevent the both of them from killing all of the Police Officers in the station with the Death Note from the safety of their own Jail Cells, and running off with the keys to a Dead Officer's Police Cruiser. This is bad. Very very bad. Death Note War Games has already escalated farther than we can afford to go. The last thing we need is the entire staff of a police station murdered overnight because they didn't realize they arrested the Death Note Killer at a Traffic Stop and brought him in for questioning. We need to get a message to the other Police Stations and figure out who took them into Custody before all of this backfires on us.
APD CHRISTIAN FRITZ:
That's easier said than done Chief. If Kevin Neece is being haunted by the System Force, and it's sabotaging their computer systems and Mobile Data Terminals to prevent him from being identified, then how can we be sure that they will receive the warnings that we're about to send out? And to that matter, Austin Texas is about to fall victim to a terrible storm tonight. It's all over the news. Wherever Kevin Neece and Sepheranz the Spider Queen are hiding, those Police Officers might be boxed in with them the entire night because of the Storm with no way to communicate outside their Station due to the System Force. Whoever had the misfortune of arresting Kevin Neece, they're about to be in for one hell of a night.
CUT TO:
INT. POLICE STATION - NIGHT
CAPTAIN THORNY:
Were you able to check up on their plates or identification?
OFFICER FARVA:
No... all of our systems went down.
CAPTAIN THORNY:
How long have our systems been down?
OFFICER FARVA:
I don't know... about twenty, thirty minutes... everything went dead about the same time you walked in the door with these two.
Lightning strikes. All attention turns on Kevin Neece and Sepheranz The Spider Queen.
CAPTAIN THORNY:
Who are you?
KEVIN NEECE:
I told you. I told you back at the car. My name is Victor Morozoff. And this is my wife Gloria.
CAPTAIN THORNY:
Victor Morozoff? Is that supposed to be Jewish? Or Russian? Because you suspiciously don't look Jewish or Russian. You claimed you drove in from Los Angeles California, but I have a pretty good ear for accents, and you were clearly born and raised in Local Texas. And what was your wife's name again?
SEPHERANZ THE SPIDER QUEEN:
Gloria Rose Turner.
(beat)
CAPTAIN THORNY:
That's not what he said back at the car. He said your name was Barbara.
SEPHERANZ THE SPIDER QUEEN:
Barbara Turner is my writer alias. I used to moonlight as a screenwriter back in Los Angeles California. I was born in Brooklyn New York, but I did attend the University of Texas in Austin to study acting.
CAPTAIN THORNY:
Oh, so now you're a Hollywood Screenwriter from Los Angeles California? Name one movie you worked on that I've heard of.
SEPHERANZ THE SPIDER QUEEN:
I wrote the screenplay adaptation for Stephen King's Cujo back in 1983 under the alias of Lauren Currier. Outside of that, you wouldn't know any of my other screenwriting work. I made a living and paid the rent... let's put it that way.
OFFICER FARVA:
Are you fucking shitting me? Thorny, only you could be so lucky as to bring in the screenwriter of Cujo. What are the fucking odds of that happening?
CAPTAIN THORNY:
Yes Farva, what are the odds of that happening? So your legal name is Gloria Rose Turner. And his legal name is Victor Morozoff, I'll buy that for a dollar. You both recently got married in Los Angeles California, so you didn't have time to legally change your name... but you've both been living in Austin Texas long enough to change the plates on your vehicle... and your husband who just drove in from Los Angeles California clearly has a local Texas Accent. And none of us can verify any of this because all of our systems and wifi went offline the minute you conveniently walked through our doors. Do you both realize what this sounds like?
CAPTAIN O'HAGAN:
I know exactly what it looks like. It looks like the both of them are giving each other signals and playing off each other like a Vaudeville Comedy Act. Something is not right about this. I want you to take these two and separate them, put them in separate rooms and see if their answers still match up.
Lightning Strikes.
KEVIN NEECE:
I don't see what the issue here is. You're suspicious because your computer systems and wifi went down after we just arrived? Are you suggesting that we're both somehow responsible for all of your electronic difficulties? How could any of this possibly be our fault? What are you all afraid of, that Officer Farva might have to bite the bullet and start jacking off to porno magazines again because his iphone isn't working?
OFFICER FARVA:
I'm already two steps ahead of you.
SEPHERANZ THE SPIDER QUEEN:
You would be Officer Farva.
CAPTAIN THORNY:
We never said the phones weren't working.
KEVIN NEECE:
I'm sorry?
CAPTAIN THORNY:
We said the computer systems and the wifi were down. But we never told you the phones weren't working.
KEVIN NEECE:
Just what are you getting at?
OFFICER FARVA:
Yes Victor... do tell us... how did you know the phone signals weren't working when Captain Thorny already confiscated your iphone? And what's this anime show that you've been using as your wallpaper? It looks like Three Goddesses from Heaven or something.
CAPTAIN THORNY:
What's the passcode to your iphone?
KEVIN NEECE:
It's deeply personal.
CAPTAIN THORNY:
Why don't you want us to see what's on your phone if it would collaborate your story and verify your identities? What are you hiding from us Victor?
KEVIN NEECE:
I'm not hiding anything from you Captain Thorny. I just don't trust Police Officers trying to break into my iphone.
SEPHERANZ THE SPIDER QUEEN:
Aren't we allowed the right to remain silent until we can speak to our Lawyer?
CAPTAIN O'HAGAN:
Why are you so quick to go running and hiding behind your lawyer Barbara? We haven't even charged you with a crime yet. How were you two planning to call your lawyer when all of the phones, the computers, and the wifi aren't even working right now?
OFFICER URSULA:
I've got a solution to all of this that will shut everyone up. How about we just bite the bullet, and send someone out in a cruiser to another station where the internet and the computer systems are working. I can cross reference their information and their license plates and meet back up with you here later.
CAPTAIN THORNY:
You want to go out in this storm while its still raining cats and dogs? A couple of local officers from the APD Intelligence Unit died doing that. I believe their names were Christian Fritz and Valerie Wosnig. The both of them died under similar flooding conditions no less than 72 hours apart from each other, and they both worked for the APD Intelligence Unit. Christian Fritz died on Fritz Hughes Road. How weird is that shit?
KEVIN NEECE:
Oh I can explain that.
(beat)
CAPTAIN THORNY:
What do you mean you can explain that? How can anybody explain that? It looks like the Angel of Death got bored and they were fucking with them for their own personal amusement. That's what it looks like.
KEVIN NEECE:
Godfather you know everything.
Lightning Strikes.
CAPTAIN O'HAGAN:
I've had enough of this for one night. Separate the both of them immediately. Send Officer Ursula to the next station over, run everything through the system and see if they have any records that match up to their physical descriptions. Something is not right about this. My Spider Sense is Tingling. This is giving me the Heebie Jeebies.
CUT TO:
INT JAIL CELL
RYUK THE SHINIGAMI:
Kevin... this is your attorney and personal spiritual advisor. The names of the Police Officers who are holding you hostage are Captain John Thorny, Officer Rod Farva, Captain John O'Hagan, and the woman is Officer Ursula Hanson. If you and Sepheranz want this to end, and you want to get out of here, then you know what needs to be done.
KEVIN NEECE:
No General Ryuk. I don't know what needs to be done. Not anymore. I can't do it General Ryuk. I can't bring myself to kill my way out of every single life problem that comes my way with a Death Note anymore. Death Note isn't a blessing. Death Note is a fucking Curse.
RYUK THE SHINIGAMI:
Why not? You've already taken out nearly all of your enemies. What's the difference?
KEVIN NEECE:
The only difference is these specific Police Officers haven't done anything to us. They haven't physically attacked us. They haven't charged us with a crime. As far as we can tell, they don't even know who we are or that we're all over the news right now. Captain Thorny was just doing his job when he took us in.
RYUK THE SHINIGAMI:
These officers have been busting your balls all night. If you continue to waste your time, sooner or later they are going to find a way to identify you. Maybe not Sepheranz, but you, most definitely.
KEVIN NEECE:
Of course they were busting my balls. They're Police Officers. It's their fucking job. If they didn't find the humor in their jobs, then every day of their lives would be a living nightmare. Why is it necessary to enforce the death penalty on them for a crime that they haven't committed? Why is it necessary to Death Note them just because they had the misfortune of coming into contact with Kevin Neece? We could have been taken down by any different number of Police Officers in the Austin Texas area, but would any of them have deserved to die in their place? Seiji Noma tried to warn me that this was going to happen to me. I wish I had the common sense to listen to him when he reached out to me.
RYUK THE SHINIGAMI:
What makes you think that Sepheranz is going to hold back when they attempt to take her to the mat in the interrogation rooms?
KEVIN NEECE:
Oh I'm sure that Sepheranz is tickled to no end that this is happening to her. She's just going to toy with them like she always does. No more Death Note for tonight General Ryuk. I've had enough Death Note for an entire lifetime. We're just going to have to explore all of our other options and problem solve our way out of this situation without killing all of the Police Officers in the process. And we're going to have to do it before Officer Ursula makes it to the next station over and identifies us. I know that's not the answer you want to hear, but what more do you want from me?
RYUK THE SHINIGAMI:
But there is no right or wrong answer Kevin. Whether the Police Officers live or die tonight, or tomorrow, or twenty years from now, the only difference can be the choices that you choose to make. And the people who you choose to make them against. Just remember Kevin. Nobody ever promised that making the Hard Decisions in life would be easy. That's why they're called the Hard Decisions. Because Life is Hard. And that's why we need people like you to make them. Knowing when to take a life, and when to spare one, is never going to be easy. It's always going to be a Long Dark Road and sometimes it will come with serious consequences that can backfire on you. So be careful when you attempt to open Pandora's Box, because once the ultimate evil gets released out into the world, there is no way to put it back.
Ryuk the Shinigami disappears from the Prison Cell.
CUT TO:
INT. AUSTIN POLICE DEPARTMENT OFFICE
APD CHRISTOPHER FRITZ:
We're telling you the truth, there are no locals civilians listed in our System Databanks living in the Austin Texas area named Gloria Rose Turner or Victor Morozoff. The only screenwriter from Los Angeles California named Barbara Turner died back in 2016. She was the former wife of Vic Morrow and the mother of Jennifer Jason Leigh. Vic Morrow is the Actor who died on Twilight Zone The Movie back in 1982. Our Suspect keeps going around telling everyone that he believes he was being haunted by a Death Goddess named Hekate Goddess of the Crossroads, because he was Vic Morrow in his Past Life and the Death Goddess reincarnated him so she could continue to haunt him in the Next Life as his Spirit Wife and work on his Ah My Goddess fan films as his producer and co-writer, while she was teaching him all of her secrets for how she had been killing all of our favorite Hollywood Actors as far back as Saturday Night Live in the 1970s. Sometimes Real Life can be Stranger than Fiction, and that's exactly what this case is.
APD CHIEF LISA DAVIS:
The Coincidences are not unfounded. Our Suspect repeatedly tells everyone that he keeps seeing repeated occurrences of the Numerology Patterns concerning the Numbers 23 and FATE = 32 every day when he checks his iphone at random, or on vehicle license plates every time he goes out driving. His own daughter was a victim of the haunting and it resulted in her being sent to college in Salem Massachusetts where they kept putting her in dorm rooms with the Numbers 23 and 32. What happened to his daughter was disturbingly similar to the plot of The Devil's Advocate where The Devil Al Pacino was secretly puppeteering his Lawyer Son Keanu Reeve's Career. The Lawyer in The Devil's Advocate was named after Kevin Neece because the screenwriter was secretly being influenced by the Death Goddesses from his Anime Show. The Main Character in his Anime Show was based on a Norse Mythology Demon named The Puppeteer Mokkurkalfi, who is currently facing the Death Penalty on the FBI's Most Wanted Terrorist List because he murdered Kash Patel on Live National Television in the White House Press Conference Room. And the Numerology Numbers 23 and 32 keep showing up in the Death Situations reported on Social Media News that he sends to our Homicide Unit and the CIA. And everything that he sees is surrounded by Irony and Coincidence. Barbara Turner attended the University of Texas for Acting Classes. Our Suspect's mother worked for the University of Texas her entire life as an Administrative Assistant, and her son would repeatedly spend his summers hanging out at her office and running errands for her around Campus to pass the time. That's why he keeps saying that Empire Records and Kevin Smith's Mallrats are documentaries about his childhood. It's because her Office at the University of Texas was located by Tower Records off of Guadalupe Street, and it was the only place appropriate for a teenager to hang out because he could pass the time browsing all of the VHS tapes they were selling.
APD CHRISTIAN FRITZ:
Our Suspect spent his childhood frequenting several of the Local Malls in Austin Texas just like the Kevin Smith movie Mallrats, and there are ways to track which Mall Hangouts he frequented during which specific years based on the films he saw in theaters. His Grandmother used to make him go walking with her around the Westgate Mall every morning before the shops were open. Westgate Mall used to have a Movie Theater, a Comic Book Shop, a Service Merchandise that sold Nintendo Cartridges, a Coin Fountain, and a Video Arcade. He saw Jim Carrey's The Mask at that Theater which was 1994. He saw Power Rangers The Movie at that Theater which was 1995. He remembers the posters for Tales from the Crypt Bordello of Blood at that Theater which was 1996. He saw Peter Jackson's The Frighteners at that Theater which was 1996. The Comic Book Shop introduced him to a Dark Horse Comics series called Comics Greatest World, which were in release during 1993 to 1995, and would later influence his Ah My Goddess fan films such as Who Shot Mike Richardson decades later. He never bought the Comic Books, he would just read them in the Comic Books Shop without paying for them because he didn't have any money. And he would frequently go fishing for quarters in the Coin Fountain so he could play Video Games in the Arcade. Service Merchandise was the only store that was open during the mornings when his grandmother would make him go walking around the Mall, so he would frequently visit Service Merchandise to window shop all of the Nintendo Cartridges because they were the only things in the store that interested him. He was born in 1983, so that places his age range for Westgate Mall between 10 years old to 13 years old. Westgate Mall was closed down and demolished in 1996, the same year he saw Peter Jackson's The Frighteners. They built over it and replaced it with the current Westgate Theater and Amy's Ice Cream.
OFFICER URSULA:
Your obsession with our Local Serial Killer's Love of Defunct Shopping Malls from his Childhood is fascinating, but what the holy fuck does anything that you've just said have to do with what's been happening at our station?
APD CHIEF LISA DAVIS:
It's because he got taken into police custody on his way to the Barton Creek Mall. We shut down the Power Grid and the Wifi Internet at his Home Address and set up a trap for him at the Local Starbucks and Shopping Mall Food Courts because he's going where the Wifi is to stay on the internet and monitor what we're doing in the Death Note War. He's been targeting the police stations that keep threatening him because they are too stupid to realize that their entire staff volunteered their real names to the business websites like Rocket Reach. That's all he needs to kill someone with the Death Notes. He just needs our names. We can't take him into police custody because he researched and memorized the names of our entire staff, meaning he could wipe out the entire police station from the safety of his own jail cell.
OFFICER URSULA:
Your own Jail Cells? I think you mean the safety and comfort of OUR own jail cells. He's not in your police station right now! He's being interrogated in our police station during the fucking Storm of the Century! Our Police Officers are professional pranksters who live to fuck with people and troll them into oblivion! They've been getting away with it for the past few decades! And there's no way for us to warn them what's about to happen to them because none of our electronics are working! What do you think is about to happen to all of them if they take it too far and back him into a corner, and he has the ability to murder all of them from his Jail Cell, and walk right out the front doors with the keys to their Police Cruisers? We have to stop him! We have to warn them before it's too late!
CUT TO:
INT. POLICE STATION
CAPTAIN O'HAGAN:
Something about tonight has been bothering me. Something that I can't quite place my finger on. Something that's been eating away at the pit of my stomach. Victor Morozoff... how many people do you believe are in this police station right now?
KEVIN NEECE:
By my count... probably six.
CAPTAIN THORNY:
Six People? Captain O'Hagan, Myself, and Officer Farva count as Three. And Victor Morozoff and Gloria Rose Turner count as Two. That's 3 and 2. How many Goddesses were on Victor's iphone wallpaper?
CAPTAIN O'HAGAN:
There were Three Goddesses on the iphone. Three Police Officers in this Station. And only two alleged suspects, who are presently not yet being charged with a crime... not yet. But I wouldn't get my hopes up. And one of them keeps engaging in conversation with himself when he thinks we aren't looking. You want to know what I think is going on Thorny? I think we've been bamboozled from the moment you picked these two up. You didn't bring two people into this station. There's a third man running around that we haven't seen yet. Someone who figured out how to sabotage our Mobile Data Terminals, our Computers, our Iphones and Landlines, and our Backup Generators. And we can't cross check the security cameras because we've been operating by candle light. This horse shit doesn't just happen by accident or coincidence, during the middle of the Goddamn Storm of the Century overnight.
OFFICER FARVA:
Funny you should mention that. Storm of the Century was a Stephen King Television Mini-series. And Gloria Rose Turner claims to be the screenwriter of Stephen King's Cujo. What are the odds of that coincidence?
KEVIN NEECE:
Just give me what I want and I'll go away.
CAPTAIN THORNY:
Victor Morozoff... if that's your real name...
KEVIN NEECE:
The jokes on you. That actually is my real name. I'm not making this shit up. I mean, how many people do you think are living in Austin Texas who happen to share the same name right?
CAPTAIN THORNY:
We never said you shared the same name with anybody.
KEVIN NEECE:
Whoa whoa whoa... Settle down Captain Thorny... I think there's been some kind of misunderstanding here. When I said there were Six People in the Station, the Sixth Person I was referring to was the Police Woman that you sent out to verify our identities.
CAPTAIN THORNY:
Yes Victor. What are the odds that the one Police Officer in this station who was brave enough to venture out by herself to verify your identities, during the Storm of the Century, would wind up going AWOL for the next three hours?
KEVIN NEECE:
Well I don't know about that. It's a pretty hectic Storm going on outside.
OFFICER FARVA:
Thorny is right. It's a thirty minute drive to the next station over. And a thirty minute drive back. Account for thirty additional minutes to verify their identities and run them through their systems, and possibly another thirty minutes because of safety issues involving the Storm of the Century. That's two hours maximum... and Officer Ursula has been gone for three hours... what's the hold up? Do you think something may have happened to her?
CAPTAIN O'HAGAN:
Given that all of our electronics keep being sabotaged whenever fucking Victor Morozoff comes into contact with them... yeah, I find myself questioning what just happened to the one person that went out to verify his fucking identity.
KEVIN NEECE:
But you said it yourself Captain O'Hagan. We've got a Alleged Third Man running around. So Riddle Me This Covfefe. How can this ever elusive Third Man, who has successfully evaded all of your security cameras, and magically sabotaged all of your electronics like the Energizer Bunny from Hell, how can this alleged Third Man be in two different places at the exact same time? He can't be running around this station, and sabotaging the police cruisers at the exact same time now can he? And that's assuming such a Third Man isn't in your imagination. Which he is by the way. If I were you, I might consider looking into a mental health service called Intregal Care. Trust me on this. One encounter with those fucking people will give you an entirely new perspective on life.
CAPTAIN THORNY:
We never said that your Alleged Third Man evaded the Security Cameras. We said that we don't have the ability to check them because the Power went out and our Backup Generators aren't working. We've been operating by Candle Light for the past two hours. Sooner or later, everything is going to come back on, and then whatever the fuck has been happening in this station is going to be examined by the Security Team. You and Gloria Rose Turner aren't going anywhere until we can figure out what the fuck is going on, and why you both keep acting like you're both attempting to evade the law. It doesn't take a genius detective like Sherlock Holmes to decipher that the both of you have been fucking with us all night. I'm a master at fucking with people. We intentionally fuck with people for a living to amuse ourselves on the job. We've been getting away with it for decades, and it takes Bullshit Artist to spot one.
KEVIN NEECE:
Captain Thorny, I am begging you to listen to reason here. Who do you realistically believe our Alleged Third Man could possibly be? Is it Harvey the Invisible Rabbit?
Lightning Strikes.
CAPTAIN O'HAGAN:
What did you just say? Repeat that again...
KEVIN NEECE:
I'm sorry, I'm sorry, have I have taken my love of James Stewart movies too far Captain O'Hagan? Did I say something to offend you? You'll have to forgive me. I've been accused of having no moral boundaries before... but they're not entirely wrong. I don't.
(beat)
CAPTAIN O'HAGAN:
Thorny... did you hear what he just said?
(beat)
CAPTAIN THORNY:
Yeah... I heard it too. Do you think we should tell him?
(beat)
CAPTAIN O'HAGAN:
No... Don't tell him anything. Victor Morozoff is like a mushroom. Keep feeding him shit and keep him in the dark.
OFFICER FARVA:
Do you think Officer Ursula is ever planning to come back?
CUT TO:
EXT. AUSTIN POLICE CRUISER STUCK IN THE RAIN
CUT TO:
INT. AUSTIN POLICE CRUISER STUCK IN THE RAIN
OFFICER URSULA:
No. No no no. Why the fucking hell did everyone's cars just break down?
APD CHRISTIAN FRITZ:
How far away do you think we are from your Station?
OFFICER URSULA:
We were so close. It couldn't be more than a mile away. We were literally almost there. We were ten minutes away at the most. There's nothing left we can do. We're going to have to go the distance and make the last mile on foot. Even if it takes another hour to get there. We have to do something to stop this. We have to try before its too late.
APD CHRISTIAN FRITZ:
You're seriously planning to sprint the last mile in this shitstorm? Every time one of these Storms happens, people in Austin Texas wind up drowning in their own vehicles. Trust me on this, I know what I'm talking about.
OFFICER URSULA:
It's probably safer out there in the rain than waiting in here in the car until daylight. Why the fuck isn't the radio working? What happened to the Mobile Data Terminals? Why the fucking hell has everything electrical stopped working today?
APD CHRISTIAN FRITZ:
It's the Yggdrasil System Force. There is a reason why we kept our distance from Kevin Neece during Death Note War Games. Every time one of us attempts to go after him, they wind up being sabotaged by the Yggdrasil System Force depicted in the Ah My Goddess Anime Show. Everybody believes that Kevin Neece is the villain in Death Note War Games but he's not. The Villain behind all of this is Sepheranz the Spider Queen. Kevin Neece tried to turn himself into us when we set a sting operation for him at Starbucks, and he tried to warn us that we would be unable to take the Death Note away from him, even if he tried to give it to us willingly. It's because he made a Demonic Contract with Sepheranz in exchange for the Death Note, and it binded him to her. He cannot walk away from Death Note War Games because Sepheranz has him under Contract and she is manipulating him into seeing Death Note War Games through to the end, whether he likes it or not. We researched Sepheranz the Spider Queen's background on V.K. Jehannum's occultist website to try and figure out how Kevin Neece came into contact with her in the first place, and there is nothing in her background that remotely suggests that Sepheranz has any care or interest in the matters of the human race. She doesn't give a fuck about what happens to us at all. She just enjoys watching Kevin Neece torture the pedophiles with a Death Note for her own sick amusement. Sepheranz isn't helping him because she's trying to inflict justice against the Epstein Sex Criminals and the Illuminati. Sepheranz is manipulating him because she's trying to help herself. We don't know what her alternate agenda is, or what deal he made with her in exchange for the Death Note. According to the Occultists from Satania YouTube, nothing in the Spirit Underworld comes for free. Every Petition that you make comes with a Sacrificial Offering and a Price. And if you make a Devil's Bargain without making the Proper Sacrificial Offering to pay for it, then the Demons are going to take their payment out of your ass or your loved ones. So the question is, what did Kevin Neece pay in exchange for the Death Note? And how are we going to separate him from Sepheranz the Spider Queen before it's too late to save him from a Fate worse than Death?
OFFICER URSULA:
That's exactly what we did before I left the station to get help. Captain O'Hagan had us under orders to separate them and keep them apart in separate rooms to prevent them from signaling each other or influencing each other to see if their answers still matched up. Why did Kevin Neece attempt to contact Sepheranz the Spider Queen in the first place?
APD CHRISTIAN FRITZ:
He was researching Death Goddesses and Demons on Satania YouTube to try and find someone that could activate a Death Note Replica from Amazon, and their research told him about the existence of an unknown Death God named Garadaera Saladorga who only answers to Sepheranz the Spider Queen. Satania researched their Invocation Mantra off of unknown ancient sources and any other websites that weren't nailed down under the belief that Religious Prayers are Public Domain and should be freely available to the General Public. Satania YouTube somehow stumbled upon a Death God that nobody from the Christian Community had heard of before, and Kevin Neece accidentally figured out how to activate the Invocations using Hekate Goddess of the Crossroads abilities to contact Demons and Dead Relatives in the Spirit Underworld, combined with a Black Mirror in his Bedroom. Everyone in the Church of Satan claims that Demons are a work of Mental Illness, but Kevin Neece found a way to contact them when the Church of Satan couldn't. Kevin Neece found a way to convince the Demon Realm to give him results so that he could prove their existence in Court in front of a Judge after what they did to his Father on his Retirement Vacation. And that's the part that worries me the most. Kevin Neece showed me that he was conversing with a Shinigami nearly identical to Ryuk from Death Note, that nobody else but him had the ability to see themselves unless they were touching a page from the book. But Ryuk the Shinigami has no real life basis in Witchcraft or the Ars Goetia, or the Lesser Key of Solomon. The Shinigamis that inspired Death Note might have a real life basis, but Ryuk himself is a work of fiction. The only explanation is that the Shinigami that's been helping Kevin Neece is not Ryuk from the Death Note Anime Series. It's Garadaera Saladorga, and he's impersonating Ryuk to gain influence over Kevin Neece and manipulate him into doing Sepheranz the Spider Queen's bidding. Ryuk the Shinigami has secretly been Garadaera Saladorga from Satania YouTube the entire time. And Sepheranz the Spider Queen bears a physical resemblance to Mara Marller's Japanese Voice Actress Urara Takano from the Ah My Goddess Anime Series. He thinks Sepheranz the Spider Queen really looks like a Japanese Voice Actress in Real Life, but how do we know that Sepheranz isn't disguising herself as a Human to gain Kevin Neece's trust and manipulate him into doing her bidding with the Death Note? There's a reason why Sepheranz looks like Urara Takano, and it's not a coincidence at all. Sepheranz planned all of this in advance because she knew that Kevin Neece was obsessed with the Ah My Goddess Death Note anime series. It's all an illusion staged for his personal amusement to gain his trust so he'll see Death Note War Games through to the end. But it's not for his sake. And it's not for the sake of Parents all over the United States. It's because Sepheranz is getting something out of the Devil's Bargain she made with him for the Death Note. So what is it that Sepheranz the Spider Queen is after if she doesn't have any love or consideration for the Human Race to begin with? What is Sepheranz the Spider Queen planning to do after Death Note War Games is over?
OFFICER URSULA:
Whatever Sepheranz the Spider Queen is planning to do with Kevin Neece, we're not going to know about it if we continue to wait out the storm in this car. We're already running out of options and it may already be too late to stop this from happening. I'm going to have to take the risk and go the distance in the fucking rain, and pray to whatever God necessary that I can reach the station in time on foot, in one piece, before Kevin Neece or Sepheranz attempts to Death Note the Police Officers and escape in one of our Police Cruisers.
CUT TO:
INT POLICE STATION - NIGHT
CAPTAIN THORNY:
Victor... we would like to tell you a story about one of our fellow officers. A man who spent decades of his life working with us, named Officer Macintyre Womack. He couldn't be here with us tonight. Be he's still here in spirit. No Mac Womack, he was a notorious prankster. Like the rest of us, he got his jolies from mind fucking all of the drivers during his Traffic Stops. To be fair here, we have to do something to amuse ourselves on the job. But Mac Womack, in his heart, he was a true officer of the law. And Mac Womack understood that there was a time for work, and a time for play. And there is a difference between the crimes of someone who couldn't tell that they were speeding, and the crimes of someone who was evading the Truck Weigh Ins because they were smuggling drugs. But Mac Womack, he still came in to work every day, without complain, and he still did his job. So in some ways, practical joker or not, Mac Womack was an inspiration to all of us. Mac Womack didn't have any surviving Blood Relatives. Mac Womack never took a Wife or had Children like Officer Farva did. Because Mac Womack was married to his job. And in some ways, we were the only family that he had. Do you know what it's like to be married to your job Victor?
KEVIN NEECE:
Captain Thorny... I've been married to my job for the past nine years. To such an extent that I will never ever escape it or find myself doing anything else. And most of my blood relatives and family members are no longer alive. My own daughter disowned me and changed her legal name so that she wouldn't be associated with me. I made the mistake of telling her one of my darkest personal secrets when she was a young child because I thought it would bring us closer together. Instead, it backfired on me, she wanted nothing to do with me, and as soon as she came of age, she walked right out of my life and never spoke to me again. Whatever the hell happened between the two of us, nobody really knows, because neither of us like to talk about it in front of the general public. She doesn't like to bad mouth me whenever her fans ask her about me, because she doesn't want to spoil their illusions about who I was back when she still knew me. She moved on with her life, got married, had a son who came of age himself. But what I've come to realize, what I've come to learn, is that the personal crimes that you commit in one life will come back to haunt you in the next one. And when I look back upon what happened between the two of us... yeah, I'm feeling it. So tell me Captain Thorny... if Mac Womack was married to his job, where is he right now?
CAPTAIN THORNY:
You're not thinking interdimensionally Victor Morozoff. For someone that knows how to read between the lines, you failed to pick up on all of the clues and points hidden within my story. You want to tell him Captain O'Hagan.
CAPTAIN O'HAGAN:
Officer Mac Womack is currently sitting in a jar of ashes on the bookshelf in my office. Mac Womack didn't have any surviving blood relatives. He never took a wife and children. Because Officer Mac Womack was married to his job. And we were the only family that he ever had. He may not be here in person tonight, but he will always be here in spirit.
(beat)
KEVIN NEECE:
I'm sorry for your loss. How long has he been passed away?
CAPTAIN THORNY:
He died only about a week ago. He was answering a domestic violence call, and when it became necessary to defend himself to break up the argument, the three of them died from a Heart Attack without any kind of explanation. We couldn't figure out how it happened to all three of them at the same time. And then the Death Note War was announced all over the News, and Police Officers all over the United States starting dying in the line of duty because their Firearms kept backfiring on them. We were all placed under direct orders to lock away all of our firearms until the United States Government could figure out what to do about Death Note War Games. What do you think Captain O'Hagan. Do you think we should still tell him?
CAPTAIN O'HAGAN:
Okay Thorny... Now you can tell him.
(beat)
CAPTAIN THORNY:
One of the Homicide Units for the Austin Police Department had inside information about the Death Note Killer because he had been sending them daily emails for the past nine years and openly confessed to every crime that he had ever committed because he was involved in a Government Corruption Case that nobody wanted to prosecute in front of the General Public. When they took their information to Police Chief Lisa Davis, they cut off the power to his home address to remove him from the internet, then set up a sting operation for him at all of the Local Starbucks and Wifi Hot Spot Locations with Undercover Police Officers dressed in Civilian Clothes. All of the Police Officers involved in the Sting Operation died from Food Poisoning, and the only survivor claimed that they had been killed by Harvey the Invisible Rabbit.
(beat)
The Austin Police Department were unable to place the Death Note Killer under arrest because he warned them that he had memorized the names of their entire staff using information that they had willingly volunteered about themselves to the business websites like Rocket Reach. Meaning that he had the ability to wipe out and kill their entire staff from the safety of his own Jail Cell. Now as fucked up as this all sounds, I'm not going to lie. Everybody loves Death Note. And everybody loves Dead Pedophiles. They're a winning combination to be sure. But what happened to Officer Mac Womack this past week. That I cannot abide.
(beat)
KEVIN NEECE:
Thorny... nobody is asking you to forgive what happened to Mac Womack, or any other police officers who have died during the Death Note War. If you want to place that grudge on your own shoulders, and harvest that anger for the rest of your life. There is nothing I can say to convince you otherwise. But I'm telling you right now, I know all about harvesting a life grudge for decades. I have first hand experience about the futility of the nature of revenge. I have been put in the unfortunate position of standing up to bullies and bosses my entire life. People were sitting in an untouchable position of unchecked power. People who thought they could get away with anything that they wanted because nobody would come forward to hold them accountable. People who could have me shit canned, blacklisted, and personally destroyed. And that's exactly what they tried to do to me. They systematically blacklisted me, and in the process they made me completely invisible to the human race, until it psychologically drove me into a state of disgruntled insanity, where I had no moral boundaries for who I attempted to target, or who I attempted to stand up to, just like Travis Bickle from the Martin Scorsese movie Taxi Driver. And every single time that I got my revenge and took them out of commission, every single time that the Goddess Hotline Office gave me my revenge, none of these people ever responded to me, none of them ever acknowledged me, none of them acted like they had just been punished for their actions in front of the general public, they just kept on trucking like nothing had happened to them. And none of the revenge that I inflicted upon them ever fixed any of my personal life problems. Everything that I did made my life even worse, and made everyone that I reached out to even more afraid to respond to me. Fate gave me the Justice that I asked for, but by the time that I finally got what I wanted, I realized that I no longer cared about it anymore. Revenge was completely unfulfilling and unsatisfying. Revenge was a completely empty emotional experience for me. Getting my Revenge was like watching Wiley Coyote finally catch the Road Runner. It was like watching Captain Hook being fed to the Crocodiles, and without the Quest for that Revenge in my Life, I had nothing to give my life purpose anymore. So instead of accepting the Justice that Fate had bestowed on me, I just went out looking to seek Justice against someone else. Somebody, Anybody, Everybody. It made no difference to me who they were. My bloodlust for Revenge dug me into a hole, and the harder that I tried to dig myself out of that hole, the deeper that my hole became, and the harder it was to dig myself out of it, until one day I finally came to realize the ultimate unforgivable truth. That I dedicated my life to so much revenge, that the hole I had made for myself had become so deeper, that there was no longer any chance for me to escape it. So I began shouting out to the World above me to warn them about my life. But the hole was so deep that all of my words fell on deaf ears. It's because I was being systematically blacklisted, alienated, and ignored by everyone I reached out to online. I had finally become just as Invisible to the Human Race as Almighty God himself. For there stands the price to those who play God in the Machine, we are the Thankless, the Invisible, the Unnoticed, God's Regime. Compassion was never necessary to prove that you were kind. For Fate will always share your burden, as you chose wisely to share in mine. So go ahead Captain Thorny. Give yourself over to Revenge and Resentment if you feel that's what will satisfy you and make the pain go away. But just remember, if you spend your entire life holding a grudge over someone that you cannot bring yourself to let go. Then one day, you are going to wake up and realize that you have become an even bigger loser than I am. I can't go back in time and save Mac Womack any more than I could go back in time and save my own father. It's time for me to accept that my father is dead and he's never coming back. So it appears that you've finally backed me into a corner. It appears that you've finally got my back up against the wall. The ball is in your court Thorny. So what are you three going to do about it?
CAPTAIN O'HAGAN:
He's right. We finally got what we wanted. Now what are we supposed to do?
KEVIN NEECE:
I'll tell you exactly what you are going to do. You are going to hand over the keys to one of your police cruisers. And then myself and Barbara Turner are going to forget your full legal names, and drive off into the night. And when your operating systems start working again, you are going to report your police cruiser stolen, and then you are all going to move on with your lives. And then one day twenty years from now, when your children have reached adulthood, and you get the honor of watching them graduate from college, you are going to look back on what just happened between us tonight, and you are going to realize that the past twenty years of your lives were gift. A gift that you all received from me. I am not asking you. I am not telling you. I am not ordering you. And I am not threatening you. I am getting down on my knees and I am begging you to listen to reason. For once in your miserable lives, please listen to me for all of the others who didn't. Please do not back me into a corner and force me to go through with this. I've already got the entire weight of a nation on my shoulders. I don't need to add all of you to it after what just happened between us tonight. It is never easy to make the hard decisions for when it is necessary to take a human life, when it is necessary to spare one, and having the wisdom and the humility to tell the difference. Nobody wanted to give me a job for the past sixteen years, nobody that I reached out to listened to me when I reached out to them and laid it down. So the Goddess Hotline Office gave me a job for all of the people who didn't. They put me in charge of a job and charged me with making the Hard Decisions that no human being on Earth should ever have to make. We are at war with the Cult of Baal, and when you are at war, innocent people like Mac Womack are always going to get caught in the crossfire. But that doesn't give you the right to sit back and allow the enemy to do whatever they want. The American Public demanded justice in the Epstein Investigation. And they just got what they asked for. So be careful what you wish for. Because once you open Pandora's Box, and you unleash the Ultimate Evil into the World, you are all going to discover that there is never going back.
(beat)
CAPTAIN THORNY:
Officer Farva... I think its time for you to retrieve Barbara Turner from her cell.
OFFICER FARVA:
Yeah... I think it's time to let them go too. The Storm of the Century is finally over. And it looks like they just went the distance and took us all the way though the night. It's already daylight outside.
CUT TO:
EXT POLICE CRUISER SPEEDING OFF INTO THE DISTANCE
CUT TO:
INT POLICE STATION - MORNING
OFFICER URSULA:
What happened! Where did Victor Morozoff and Barbara Turner go!
CAPTAIN THORNY:
We took both of them to the mat and interrogated them throughout the night, and when we finally had Victor Morozoff backed into a corner, he made us an offer we couldn't refuse, then they ran off with one of our stolen police cruisers. You just missed them by five minutes.
OFFICER URSULA:
What did he say to you?
CAPTAIN O'HAGAN:
We told him the life story of Officer Macintyre Womack. And then he stood up to both of us, he got down on his knees, and delivered the most empathetic speech of his life about the devastating consequences of harvesting life grudges and the nature of human revenge, as if they were about to be his famous last words, and then he begged us not to make him go through with it.
CAPTAIN THORNY:
Whatever crimes Victor Morozoff was guilty of, it looks like they were psychologically tearing him apart.
CAPTAIN O'HAGAN:
I've dedicated decades of my life to the Austin Police Department... but tonight of all nights... during the middle of the Storm of the Century... for the first time in my career... I feel like we've just bore witness to the complete and utter destruction of a man's human soul.
(beat)
OFFICER URSULA:
Victor Morozoff is the legal name for Vic Morrow, the actor who died on the set of Twilight Zone The Movie back in 1982. Gloria Rose Turner was the legal name for his first wife Barbara Turner, who died back in 2016. They stole their identities using their unknown legal names and took details from their personal lives out of context to make it look like their marital relationship was still happening in a completely different decade in 2026, because they knew you couldn't cross reference or verify the information they were giving you online. They knew that the Goddess Hotline Office was sabotaging all of your electrical operating systems with the Yggdrasil System Force to prevent you from identifying them. Barbara Turner did have an extensive film career as a screenwriter, but outside of Stephen King's Cujo, none of the films that she made were widely known among pop culture film enthusiasts. A Police Officer who doesn't watch old movies or rarely goes to the Theaters would not have a good ear for any of the films that she made. The only people that would have general working knowledge of Barbara Turner's film career, would be a theater pirate who dedicated four years of his life to deconstructing all of the theatrical preshows and theater programming from the Alamo Drafthouse throughout 400 individual theater screenings. Someone who obsessively studied and deconstructed all of the film historian's knowledge being put on display by the Theater Programmers who educated themselves by working in the Video Archives like Scarecrow Video in Seattle Washington. The man that you were interrogating as Victor Morokoff was Kevin Neece, the maker of Ah My Goddess. And in his attempts to enforce Vigilante Justice on the Rothschild Family Illuminati and the Epstein Island Sex Traffickers, he systematically wiped out and killed half of the Police Officers in the United States. And all of them were just sentenced to an Eternity in the Dungeons of Niflheim. Also known as Viking Hell.
(beat)
CAPTAIN O'HAGAN:
So tell me Thorny. Based on what almost just happened to us tonight... Do you still think it's a good idea to prank and troll all of the civilians during your traffic stops?
(beat)
CAPTAIN THORNY:
They could have taken us out the entire time and walked right out the door at any given moment.
(beat)
OFFICER FARVA:
Captain O'Hagan... I know this isn't very helpful to you right now... but I just thought you should know. Our Operating Systems just came back online.
CUT TO:
INT BARTON CREEK MALL - MADEA INTERROGATION CLIMAX
MADEA:
No Kevin... I have a confession to make... everybody who is walking around this mall... and sitting down in the Food Court... is an Austin Police Officer wearing Civilian Clothes... everyone sitting with them are their wives... their husbands... their children... none of these people are actors... this is who we are when we aren't on the clock and wearing a badge... and none of these people were stupid enough to eat at the Food Court after what you and Ryuk the Shinigami just showed us during the Food Poisoning Incident at Starbucks. They may have food sitting in front of them on the tables... but they didn't actually eat it...
KEVIN NEECE:
What about that guy who just dropped dead onto the floor.
MADEA:
Oh that guy? Well apparently one of them made the mistake of skipping breakfast and was stupid enough to eat at the Food Court, because he didn't actually read the emails we sent out, but the rest of them, yeah, I'm pretty sure they're unaffected. The point I'm trying to illustrate is... people see us on the news and think we're all a bunch of corrupt trigger happy racist pigs on an ego trip that pretty much get away with anything that we want. But that's not true at all. The reason why you see all of these corrupt police officers being plastered all over the news, is because somebody in the criminal justice system did care. And even if we were unable to inflict proper justice against them in a court of law... seeking justice in the eyes of the law isn't always about getting a fair judgment. Seeking justice in the eyes of the law is about meeting your opponent halfway and holding them accountable in front of the judge in front of the entire Social Media News, so that if they accidentally do escape the hangman, the general public will brand them for life. Nobody ever truly walks away from a crime unpunished and without being scandalized in view of the general public. It goes on their permanent life record and the general public never ever lets them forget about it. That's why the United States Congress forced the FBI to release the Epstein Files even though they refused to press charges against the Sex Traffickers and the Illuminati. They wanted the general public to see with their own eyes what the Hollywood Celebrities and Politicians they were worshiping were doing behind their backs. And they wanted everyone to know that the FBI was protecting them because of the Corrupt Government Officials that they mistakenly voted into office. Take a good look around you Kevin. Take a good long hard look at the Husbands, Wives, and Children that are sitting in this food court with their Family Members that work for the Austin Police Department. This is what you were attacking all across the United States when you convinced the Goddess Hotline Office to use the System Force in Death Note War Games. Every single Police Officer and FBI Agent who was put in the position of using their firearms in the service of their jobs, died in the line of duty because their firearms backfired on them without warning. Every single Police Officer and FBI Agent that was forced to use physical force against the Criminals they were confronting, died from a Heart Attack because they had no context for what you were doing to them. None of these people had any warning that they were about to become unwitting players in Death Note War Games, they had no knowledge of the rules that you put in place, and everyone that died had family members and children that they were providing for. Police Officers and FBI Agents have Families and Children too. Those children didn't just manifest out of thin air. It's because they were once in love with someone that they want to share their lives with. It's proof that Police Officers are Human. It's proof that they all have a Human Soul. Even if they aren't perfect. Even if they sometimes make mistakes. Because making mistakes is what makes them Human in the first place. If they didn't make mistake, then I guess that would make them comparable to Almighty God. Those Families and Children who had the misfortune to be related to Police Officers, Death Note War Games just separated them like you were separated from your father Jim Neece. They will never get to see them again. The Criminal Justice Insurance Companies that cover for our Police Officers and their Family Members, those Insurance Companies just went bankrupt from the Mass Payouts they were legally obligated to make under their own Rules and Policies. Because every one of those Police Officers who died, were killed in the line of duty. And all of those Sex Trafficker Criminals associated with the Illuminati, the ones that you believed were untouchable, all of them just stepped down and resigned because of what you just did to the United States to teach them a lesson. Including the ones that weren't on the Epstein Island Flight Logs. Including the ones you never knew about who didn't even get caught. So congratulations Kevin, you are officially going to be remembered as the Demi-God Who Took Out the Trash. It is never wise to test the Fates. But each and every one of us did exactly that when we refused to listen to your warnings for nine years... and now... all of us fucking lost. You are hereby declared the Winner of Death Note War Games. Are you happy now Kevin? Are you finally satisfied?
KEVIN NEECE:
You think I don't understand the gravity of what I've just done. You think I'm somehow unaware that what I was attempting to do was going to come at a terrible price.
MADEA:
It did come with a terrible price Kevin. It did. All of our families just paid for your actions with their lives. Don't you get it Kevin? Don't you see? There is a difference between Social Media Reality, and Reality Reality. That's the Frailty of Human Perception. The reason why you couldn't bring yourself to Death Note the Police Officers that took you into custody today, is because you were forced to engage in conversation with them, and you realized that they were human through your interactions with them. But you didn't care at all about what happened to all of those Police Officers who were being reported dead all over the news during Death Note War Games. You wrote all of them off as acceptable losses. You wrote all of them off as expendable. Their deaths didn't effect you because you see death reported on Social Media News every single day, until it reached the point that it completely desensitized you, like someone addicted to Horror Movies because what they were looking at wasn't real, it was movie magic. But that's the difference between fictional movies and social media news. What you see in the movies isn't real. But what you see on Social Media News, that actually happened. And the reason why you don't care is because you weren't there in person yourself to experience that personal loss. The only time that you did care was when Social Media Lynch Mobs and Woke Culture told you that you were supposed to care. What happened to you isn't exactly a one off case, it happened to millions of people all over the internet every single day since the invention of the internet. They see the Police Scandals on the News as a form of entertainment that gives them something to gossip about, but they don't see what those Police Officers were doing with their Families during their day to day lives when they weren't working on the clock. I don't know what to tell you anymore. I don't understand how someone as empathetic and passionate as you are can bear to live with the guilt. It's as if we were being punished by Almighty God for a crime we didn't commit. And I don't even know what that God is. But what is God to you Kevin? What is God at all? What do you perceive God to be? Is Almighty God only identifiable to what the Christian Bible presented to us from Two Thousand Years ago? Was Almighty God still Almighty God when the Vikings and the Pagans called him Urd Verdandi and Skuld before the Christian Bible came into Existence? Is Almighty God still Almighty God regardless of what names and mythologies that we choose to apply to him because he is as invisible to the Human Race as you are and we cannot tell the difference? So tell me Kevin... where is your God now? If you were so invisible to the Human Race... if you were so Karmically Punished for the Crimes of Vic Morrow performed in a Past Life... what do you believe has been secretly protecting you for the Past Forty Three Years? If Almighty God had the ability to see into your future... and saw what you were going to do to all of us this week... why did Almighty God choose to save you from Two Near Death Experiences including a Suicide Attempt that put you in the Hospital? Even if you believe that you weren't getting Justice on your Timetable, that doesn't mean that the Angels of Judging weren't always watching. What do you believe is going to happen to you when you face the Final Judgment for what you just did this week? Who do you believe is going to forgive your sins in the next life, if you've been putting your faith in Pagan Mythology instead of Jesus Christ? You put your faith in the Goddess Hotline Office because of a Fictional Japanese Anime Show. What you should have put your faith in was Jesus Christ and Almighty God. The fact that you made it this far without being killed. The fact that your daughter and your mother are still alive. The fact that the Trump Administration and the Illuminati didn't have you wiped off the face of the earth. That should be proof enough that Almighty God still loves you and forgives you. It's not my place to decide who goes to Heaven and who goes to Hell. Sometimes the only thing you can do, is throw yourself to the wind, and hope you survive the fall. Sometimes the only justice you can hope for is to let God sort them out. It's not your place to do Almighty God's job for him. Nobody in the Christian Community elected you to perform the Almighty's Job. So for once in your life, put your faith in God, and trust that Jesus Christ still has the ability do his job. That's your problem Kevin. You've been fucked over and back stabbed by so many people throughout your life, that you cannot bring yourself to trust anybody anymore. They tried to take that away from you. But they never took away your Human Soul. That's why you couldn't bring yourself to kill the Police Officers today.
KEVIN NEECE:
You want me to put my faith in Jesus Christ? Then where is he? If Jesus Christ is coming back in the near future? Where has he been hiding all this week?
JESUS CHRIST:
I'm right here Kevin. I'm right by your side where I need to be. Whatever Force of Fate has been haunting you your entire life. It was so desperate to protect you, that when I tried to leave this earth into the Future with the Marller Gang, Fate reached out to us across the span of three thousand years into the future. Fate sent it's message to three people who didn't even know us, who never even met us, and they chased us down across eight difference centuries with no hope of ever catching up to us, just so they could give us a message, and bring us back home to you. And all three of those people paid for their efforts with their lives within no less than five minutes after we came back. That's how far Fate went to bring me back into your life again. What you tried to do to the Cult of Baal this week. We already did that to them thousands of years ago. We specifically warned all of our followers not to go out and give worship to them for a reason. And a bunch of Hollywood Producers went out and did it anyways, because they believed that finding success in the Film Industry was more important than having a Human Soul. We completely wiped the Cult of Baal out of existence. And all it took was a bunch of Film Executives with No Common Sense to bring Baal the Canaanite Demon back from the Spirit Underworld. And the most damning part of all, is that Baal the Canaanite Demon was a Jewish Religion. And I'm remembered as the King of the Jews.
FADE OUT
